Members Only

A few of our friends have become pregnant or had their first child recently. So between pregnancy gifts and shower gifts, I have written a few cards as of late and discovered that it is impossible to tell someone about parenthood.

Parenthood (no matter if you birthed them or were blessed with them in another way) is a club like no other. One with countless benefits, and countless struggles - both of which will hopefully make us better people.

Some early membership includes (note, this only takes you through the first 10.5 months of membership)

- Discussing breastfeeding in public
- Crying uncontrollably because the emotions for the baby you just brought into this world are overwhelming
- Singing or making silly faces/voices in public to stop the crying (the baby's crying)
- Thinking you have the right to force your opinion on unsuspecting parents (example - this blog:))
- Forced to hear strangers opinions on why or why not your baby may or may not be sleeping, eating, crawling, napping, etc.
- Discussing bowel movements ALL THE TIME
- Taking up permanent residency in an arm chair when the baby is sick
- Finding patience when you are at the edge, because you know the baby does not understand
- Minimal sleep, but maximum play
- An instant bond with other parents
- instantly turns even the toughest of people into mush
- A need to make sure every child around you is safe
- A completely cluttered house (this is our most popular feature)

Again, this is just the tip of the iceberg, there is not enough space on the Internet to write all there is about parenthood.

To the members who do not have your own children - if you can, consider it. If you can't, love the ones around you and you too will have all the benefits of membership.

To the members that have just had your babies or are pregnant with your first child - You are/will be in survival mode and you WILL get through the first few weeks.

To the breastfeeding members - your boobs WILL stop hurting (hey - read the membership rules - I am allowed to talk about it)

To the members with more than one child, or pregnant with your 2nd child - As the rules state - please feel free to force your opinion on me as John grows up, I am sure I will need it.

To the members with a grown child - THANK YOU for your service!