Why is the house the cleanest and the chores are mostly done while I sleep? That just doesn't seem right, but it is the way it is around here. There is about 5 minutes of enjoying the semi-clean house and half-way done to-do list before it is time to shut off the lights and go to bed. Only to wake up and add the 3 "to-do's" that you thought of as you were drifting off to sleep and dirty the kitchen again when making oatmeal for the 3 year old that will cake it in the cracks of the table and drop a spoon full on the rug right before spilling his orange juice.
Another thing... it is never ending, seriously. I feel like I walk around here doing one thing after another, but never really getting anything done. Example: The events of this evening that got me to the point of writing this post.... SET SCENE: John is in bed, Matthew finally falls asleep, Carl is working on the boat outside, I decide I am going to knock out a few things on the to-do list. But first...I load the dishes and wipe of the table and counters....head to the living room to watch a few minutes of this new show to see if I am going to like it, end up picking up the living room...walk by the computer and pay the two bills we got in the mail today...while at the computer, remember to respond to a couple of emails...glance in the laundry room and see the dryer is finished, fold laundry... go into closet to get more clothes to wash, but I end up picking up the bedroom instead...start to realize that I have not really even made a dent in things that need to get done around here... start thinking about the blog and how I should write this down because these days will come and go before I know it...right??...maybe?!?!
My philosphy that gets me through it... I keep telling myself "it is one less thing to do tomorrow"
OH... NOTHING got done on the to-do list because I am off to wonder around some more and just do things as I see them.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
"Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood" experiment
With the arrival of Matthew and then the overall stage of life, we have encountered some issues with John over the past month or so. Carl and I were finding ourselves getting very frustrated with him and losing patience quickly. We did not like how it made us feel or how we were reacting to John.
I remembered that I had this book "Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood" that a few people had recommended a while back. I glanced through it a week ago today and started experiementing with some of its suggestions. I have to say, I think some of the chapters are super helpful and make sense and have worked for us. Other ideas in there are a little radical and I can not embrace in my parenting.
Specifically some things that have worked for us:
- No warnings, very little talking/lecturing and a "cue" word. One thing it says is that in life there may not be warnings, so why do we teach our kids that someone will have to tell you 3 times before something actually happens. A little extreme, but I can see the point. when an offense is made, we just say "uh-oh" in a very emphatic and sincere voice, followed by "it is so sad you have to have bedroom quiet time". Take them to the bedroom (or wherever you choose), tell them they can come out when they are ready to behave (or listen, or be sweet, or whatever) and leave them there until they are calm. John looks at us immediatly when we say "uh-oh" now and knows EXACTLY what it means. When they come out, don;t spend a lot of time lecturing them about what they did, they know what they did wrong. just move on with the day as if it did not happen. I particularly like this becuase it keeps me from getting angry and using a bad tone trying to get him to behave. knowing that I should not talk and letting myself have that option changes my mind set completely. After about 2-5 minutes, we hear John say "Mama, I am ready to listen" and then he comes out and we move on with the day. An easier way to do this is if there is an object involved, becuase then you can jsut take it with no words and you don;t have to do the quiet time thing. i.e. "uh-oh, you threw the puzzle at Mama" and then take it away with no other words.
- Give them choices - I think this is in a lot of books. But by giving them choices you give them a little control. The key is to give them choices that you are okay with, so no matter what they choose, it is okay. "Do you want to squeeze the toothpaste when we go into the bathroom to brush your teeth, or do you want to hold the toothbrush?" Either way, they are headed to the bathroom to brush teeth without fighting (in theory).
- Help them think for themselves and solve their own problems - This one takes some practice, but I am begining to catch on and I really like it. Not real sure how to explain this one shortly, but basically, do not do everything for them. Let them figure it out out their own, as long as it does not hurt them. This involves asking them a lot of questions and having them practice doing things on their own without telling them what to do. "do you think that would be a good idea or a bad idea/choice?" "Why?", if they say "I do not know" say "would you like to hear some ideas"...Like I said... hard to explain.
- Using enforceable statements:
*Instead of "pick up your toys" say "Feel free to keep any toys you clean up before bed" if he does not do it, you pick them up after he goes to bed, when he asks about it, tell him that since he did not pick them up, you took them. but then let him earn them back.
*Instead of "stop yelling/whining" say "I will listen to you when you voice is as calm as mine" or "I will listen when you use a big voice".
*Instead of "hurry up, get ready we need to leave" say "I am leaving in 10 minutes" and then walk out the door when you are ready. John has YET to not be right behind me saying "I want to come".
Anyway, I am not going to summarize the whole book. It is supposed to be from birth to 6 years. I just included a few things that seem to be relevant to us right now at 3.
I do recommend the book, but only becuase I think the more knowledge you have, the more ideas are inspired that work for your family. I am not endorsing all that is in this book.
I remembered that I had this book "Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood" that a few people had recommended a while back. I glanced through it a week ago today and started experiementing with some of its suggestions. I have to say, I think some of the chapters are super helpful and make sense and have worked for us. Other ideas in there are a little radical and I can not embrace in my parenting.
Specifically some things that have worked for us:
- No warnings, very little talking/lecturing and a "cue" word. One thing it says is that in life there may not be warnings, so why do we teach our kids that someone will have to tell you 3 times before something actually happens. A little extreme, but I can see the point. when an offense is made, we just say "uh-oh" in a very emphatic and sincere voice, followed by "it is so sad you have to have bedroom quiet time". Take them to the bedroom (or wherever you choose), tell them they can come out when they are ready to behave (or listen, or be sweet, or whatever) and leave them there until they are calm. John looks at us immediatly when we say "uh-oh" now and knows EXACTLY what it means. When they come out, don;t spend a lot of time lecturing them about what they did, they know what they did wrong. just move on with the day as if it did not happen. I particularly like this becuase it keeps me from getting angry and using a bad tone trying to get him to behave. knowing that I should not talk and letting myself have that option changes my mind set completely. After about 2-5 minutes, we hear John say "Mama, I am ready to listen" and then he comes out and we move on with the day. An easier way to do this is if there is an object involved, becuase then you can jsut take it with no words and you don;t have to do the quiet time thing. i.e. "uh-oh, you threw the puzzle at Mama" and then take it away with no other words.
- Give them choices - I think this is in a lot of books. But by giving them choices you give them a little control. The key is to give them choices that you are okay with, so no matter what they choose, it is okay. "Do you want to squeeze the toothpaste when we go into the bathroom to brush your teeth, or do you want to hold the toothbrush?" Either way, they are headed to the bathroom to brush teeth without fighting (in theory).
- Help them think for themselves and solve their own problems - This one takes some practice, but I am begining to catch on and I really like it. Not real sure how to explain this one shortly, but basically, do not do everything for them. Let them figure it out out their own, as long as it does not hurt them. This involves asking them a lot of questions and having them practice doing things on their own without telling them what to do. "do you think that would be a good idea or a bad idea/choice?" "Why?", if they say "I do not know" say "would you like to hear some ideas"...Like I said... hard to explain.
- Using enforceable statements:
*Instead of "pick up your toys" say "Feel free to keep any toys you clean up before bed" if he does not do it, you pick them up after he goes to bed, when he asks about it, tell him that since he did not pick them up, you took them. but then let him earn them back.
*Instead of "stop yelling/whining" say "I will listen to you when you voice is as calm as mine" or "I will listen when you use a big voice".
*Instead of "hurry up, get ready we need to leave" say "I am leaving in 10 minutes" and then walk out the door when you are ready. John has YET to not be right behind me saying "I want to come".
Anyway, I am not going to summarize the whole book. It is supposed to be from birth to 6 years. I just included a few things that seem to be relevant to us right now at 3.
I do recommend the book, but only becuase I think the more knowledge you have, the more ideas are inspired that work for your family. I am not endorsing all that is in this book.
Friday, April 8, 2011
An Era Begins
We experienced the first of many sporting events (well, at least I think so) this past week with John. It was about as expected, providing lots of laughs and not a lot of sport. :) PRACTICE: Luckily Garrett and Elyse are on the team (made up of co-ed 3-5 year olds), otherwise, I am not sure we would have ever gotten John to participate. I use the word loosely, but the kids "stretching" was SUPER cute! I love watching John at school and in group settings where I am simply a spectator. They ran the bases and did some catching, but there was not a lot of coaching going on. Our head coach is a last minute volunteer that has no experience. Then they got on the field and took turns batting and standing (or sitting, or dancing, or walking, or whatever) in the outfield. GAME: The first game was after only 1 practice and we were playing the best team in the league with a hard core coach and they had already practiced 6 times! WHAT?!?! THREE YEAR OLDS! It is 5 innings or 1 hour long... thank goodness for the hour time limit, or it would have been a LONG morning. Carl started putting a happy face sticker on the ball and John is able to make contact with it almost every time (as opposed to contact with the T every time). Carl is a great coach. John likes hitting and running the bases, but being the outfield is not is favorite. In fact, he spends a total of about 5.3 seconds out there before coming to sit down with us. We tried everything, he had no desire. I even tried some force, but that did not go over well and I feel really bad about it and will not do it again! The hit of the game was the big red treat bucket I brought for the team after the game (thanks to Carl suggesting this to me). Not sure John is quite ready for this, but at least it is introducing the idea of a team to him. I hope to write another blog in 6 weeks when the season is over with some learned skill or excitement over the whole thing. P.S. I am doing my best not to get nervous for him or be "that parent", but man oh man, my competitive side wants to jump right out. I am learning too! Pictures:
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
One Month
Today is Matthew's one month birthday. I can not believe so much time has already passed!
As expected, Matthew is more awake now during the day than he was in the beginning, but is still a pretty good sleeper, especially at night. I am up and back down with him within 30 minutes. A far cry from John and I's hour long ventures when he was a baby.
Last night was probably the biggest change in our lives since Matthew joined us.... I moved him to his nursery. It was great, no problem at all! I had forgotten how much I love that nursery, the set up, the design, the lighting, the furniture, the chairs, the paint, the floors...EVERYTHING! Makes me happy to be in there and I thank Carl for making it so perfect.
John has stayed pretty much the same, possibly gotten a little worse with his attitude and lack of listening.... well... until yesterday that is! I am experimenting with the Love and Logic parenting book. I know I am not crazy, but I can already see a difference in 2 days. We still have a ways to go to get through this age/stage, but I am pleased and I think it is working. I will do a full blog on it next week.
I think Matthew has chunked up, especially in the face. He eats 3 hours to the minute almost every time, give or take 30 minutes once or twice a day. He poos and pees A LOT! So I know he is getting the goods. :) I do not think he really looks like any of the three of us, but I suppose he has more of my features. Brown or blue eyes is still up in the air, although if you look at John's 1 month picture, his are absolutly blue, so I am leaning towards brown.
He tolerates is swing and will take an afternoon nap in it if he is tired enough, but he does not live in it like John did. He likes to be on the floor and play and kick. Still no real smile yet, not for lacking of trying on my part!
The most frustrating part is the evenings, he is awake from the time John goes to sleep until the time that we go to sleep. And he is awake when John naps. So there really is no break for me from both of them at the same time. I know Matthew's schedule will constantly change, so I am trying to take it day by day for now. Next week I am going to do a "week in the life" series again and maybe be able to pin point some sort of pattern that I can slightly manipulate to help out this timing situation.
Here is a few pictures from today.
Just for fun....here is a picture of John at 1 month old: 
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Our first 2 weeks as a family of 4
Matthew is a bit over 2 weeks old and I can not imagine our lives without him or before him. I have forgotten how much and how fast they change. I am going to try and wrap up a few memories over the last 2 weeks here, but hope to stay on top of the blog going forward to capture all of these precious times.
John's and Matthew:
* One of the funniest things that John has said about Matthew was when he told Nana and Da that we have to wash our hands AFTER we touch Matthew because he was going to be dirty! I think he got that turned around a bit! :)
* He is doing AWESOME with Matthew. He truly loves him and can not give him enough hugs and kisses. He "washes" (Germ-x, antibacterial stuff) his hands every time and then is super gentle with him. He does want to lean on him though, so we are working on that. One of my first and favorite memories that I will carry forever is the night that we came home from the hospital and Grammy, Granddaddy, Nana, Da and myself were at the table finishing dinner and Carl, John and Matthew were sitting on the rocking chair (John facing just the right way because he did not want to touch Matthew's feet at the time, weird?)...John sang "You are my Sunshine" to Matthew in a very sweet voice. Brought tears to my eyes!
* He has had some attitude towards Me and Carl, but totally understandable. We are trying to find the balance between patience/understanding/forgiveness and letting him run wild and form bad habits. We are getting there, but have some work to do; but what parent doesn't have some work to do?!?!? Right?!?!?
Matthew's routine so far:
* SLEEP! He sleeps so much that we thought there may be something wrong with him! John did not sleep this much the first few weeks. Grammie says that his choice to sleep over eat must come from the Jones side of the family! :) He is sleeping in our room in a bassinet. He is a pretty quiet sleeper. We swaddle him at night, but he does not fight to get out like John did, so he stays bundled up pretty easily.
* Eats....but not very well at first. I think it was the quick stay in the NICU during those crucial first hours out of the womb. We got off to a slow start and I was having to wake him up every 3 hours to eat. But we are going strong now and he wakes to eat about every 3 hours, give or take 30 minutes on either side.
* For the very little time that he is awake, we just hold him and love him. John likes to read stories during that time, or draw for him. John drawing on the chalkboard seems to be Matthew's favorite activity so far, he really does seem relaxed and appears to be watching (as much as he can anyway). He loves the sound of John's voice. So do I! :)
Matthew's appearance and personality:
* I am probably going to include a lot of comparison these first few months to John as I did not start this blog with John until he was 5 months old. I want to walk down memory lane a bit with John too. Matthew seems to be a laid back baby, he will lay there and take in the world in silence. I don;t even know he has woken up some of the times. John used to announce his awakening pretty loudly if I remember correctly.
* He will not look in my eye just yet. I know this is normal, but I really want him to!
* He has dark hair and dark skin (Carl calls him Mattito!), and I think his eyes have a chance of being brown, but too early to tell. Totally opposite from my fair-skinned, blond hair, blue eyed big boy!
* He is really skinny like John was, lots of loose skin to fill in!
* He has my toes (SUPER long) and my hair line (John had his Daddy's hair line very clearly).
* He has dimples on both sides and when he gets them both out, he looks like Grammie! I am not sure they are dimples that are going to stay though (can dimples disappear?).
Family changes:
* This is the first week that we are really getting back into routine as last week was spring break, but overall, things have not changed too much. Matthew just fits right into what we were already doing. The lack of sleep for me is the biggest change and I am still not accustomed, it is starting to catch up to me a little bit. When I nurse Matthew, it is all I can do to stay awake and then I crash about 2 or 3 in the afternoon.
* Carl was working from home last week and I have to say that it was the best thing EVER! It made the transition so much easier for us as a family. It really allowed us to work out some of those first few kinks that come with adding a baby to a family. And it helped me plan for when he is not here. I love him so much and am so blessed to raise a family with him!
* My WONDERFUL neighborhood play group is bringing dinner to us every night for 2 weeks! We are on night #2 and it is a true luxury! Seriously, taking out planning, preparing and cleaning dinner of the equation really makes the day a lot easier. And we get it for TWO WEEKS! I am blown away by the generosity!
* We our trying to spend separate and valuable time with just John which seems to be really effective. Carl and him went fishing one day already, and when Matthew is asleep or Carl is home, I make sure it is just the two of us for at least a little bit. I actually think it makes our time together more focused and fun this way.
Here are some pictures over the last couple weeks:
John's and Matthew:
* One of the funniest things that John has said about Matthew was when he told Nana and Da that we have to wash our hands AFTER we touch Matthew because he was going to be dirty! I think he got that turned around a bit! :)
* He is doing AWESOME with Matthew. He truly loves him and can not give him enough hugs and kisses. He "washes" (Germ-x, antibacterial stuff) his hands every time and then is super gentle with him. He does want to lean on him though, so we are working on that. One of my first and favorite memories that I will carry forever is the night that we came home from the hospital and Grammy, Granddaddy, Nana, Da and myself were at the table finishing dinner and Carl, John and Matthew were sitting on the rocking chair (John facing just the right way because he did not want to touch Matthew's feet at the time, weird?)...John sang "You are my Sunshine" to Matthew in a very sweet voice. Brought tears to my eyes!
* He has had some attitude towards Me and Carl, but totally understandable. We are trying to find the balance between patience/understanding/forgiveness and letting him run wild and form bad habits. We are getting there, but have some work to do; but what parent doesn't have some work to do?!?!? Right?!?!?
Matthew's routine so far:
* SLEEP! He sleeps so much that we thought there may be something wrong with him! John did not sleep this much the first few weeks. Grammie says that his choice to sleep over eat must come from the Jones side of the family! :) He is sleeping in our room in a bassinet. He is a pretty quiet sleeper. We swaddle him at night, but he does not fight to get out like John did, so he stays bundled up pretty easily.
* Eats....but not very well at first. I think it was the quick stay in the NICU during those crucial first hours out of the womb. We got off to a slow start and I was having to wake him up every 3 hours to eat. But we are going strong now and he wakes to eat about every 3 hours, give or take 30 minutes on either side.
* For the very little time that he is awake, we just hold him and love him. John likes to read stories during that time, or draw for him. John drawing on the chalkboard seems to be Matthew's favorite activity so far, he really does seem relaxed and appears to be watching (as much as he can anyway). He loves the sound of John's voice. So do I! :)
Matthew's appearance and personality:
* I am probably going to include a lot of comparison these first few months to John as I did not start this blog with John until he was 5 months old. I want to walk down memory lane a bit with John too. Matthew seems to be a laid back baby, he will lay there and take in the world in silence. I don;t even know he has woken up some of the times. John used to announce his awakening pretty loudly if I remember correctly.
* He will not look in my eye just yet. I know this is normal, but I really want him to!
* He has dark hair and dark skin (Carl calls him Mattito!), and I think his eyes have a chance of being brown, but too early to tell. Totally opposite from my fair-skinned, blond hair, blue eyed big boy!
* He is really skinny like John was, lots of loose skin to fill in!
* He has my toes (SUPER long) and my hair line (John had his Daddy's hair line very clearly).
* He has dimples on both sides and when he gets them both out, he looks like Grammie! I am not sure they are dimples that are going to stay though (can dimples disappear?).
Family changes:
* This is the first week that we are really getting back into routine as last week was spring break, but overall, things have not changed too much. Matthew just fits right into what we were already doing. The lack of sleep for me is the biggest change and I am still not accustomed, it is starting to catch up to me a little bit. When I nurse Matthew, it is all I can do to stay awake and then I crash about 2 or 3 in the afternoon.
* Carl was working from home last week and I have to say that it was the best thing EVER! It made the transition so much easier for us as a family. It really allowed us to work out some of those first few kinks that come with adding a baby to a family. And it helped me plan for when he is not here. I love him so much and am so blessed to raise a family with him!
* My WONDERFUL neighborhood play group is bringing dinner to us every night for 2 weeks! We are on night #2 and it is a true luxury! Seriously, taking out planning, preparing and cleaning dinner of the equation really makes the day a lot easier. And we get it for TWO WEEKS! I am blown away by the generosity!
* We our trying to spend separate and valuable time with just John which seems to be really effective. Carl and him went fishing one day already, and when Matthew is asleep or Carl is home, I make sure it is just the two of us for at least a little bit. I actually think it makes our time together more focused and fun this way.
Here are some pictures over the last couple weeks:
Friday, March 25, 2011
Matthew Allen Jones 3.9.2011
5:00am - My alarm goes off so that I can get up and eat the last thing before the surgery. Not like I was going to be able to sleep much past that anyway. So, I eat, shower and get ready for the day.
6:00am - Carl is up and working out
7:30 - John, Grammie and Granddaddy are all up and eating breakfast and getting ready for school.
9:00 - drop John off to school - lots of tears on the way for me.
9:15 - 12:30 - Agony! Time could not have crawled any slower! I should have left something for myself to do that day. I tried to watch day time TV (blah!) but it could not keep my attention. I was doing all that I could to keep from crying. I was trying to keep my mind off of it the best I could because I was getting so emotional. I did not really like that either though, because I felt sort of numb. But I did not want to be a ball baby.
12:30 - leave for hospital. They were so full, that they had no rooms for me, so I had to start out in recovery. Which means my parents could not go back there with us. It felt rushed and we had ALL of our bags and stuff crammed with us, but we did not have time to separate.
1:30 - Start prepping me. Then Dr. Robert came in and asked if we were ready and to start the surgery process about 2:30. Luckily Nana and Da had picked up John from school and had a successful transition to Kara and they were already on their way. So off we went.
2:45 ish - get back into the surgery room. I remember all of this this time which was SO NICE! I LOVED the anesthesiologist, she was so nice and helpful, she walked me through everything. I was numb and ready to go.
The pressure this time was so much less intense than I remembered. There was one point that a girl was sitting on my chest and pulling back the top flap of my belly and Dr. Robert pushed Matthew out, and I had no idea. I only got nausea one time for about 2 minutes when the medicine first went in.
3:23: I hear Matthew for the first time and his scream sounded like someone was gurgling mouth wash. They swept him away to do the measurements and clean up and what not. However, he could not get control of his oxygen levels due to the fluid in his lungs and he was breathing too fast. After several attempts at putting him on oxygen and then him not being able to hold the levels, the NICU nurse came in, showed him to me, let me kiss him and then rushed him away. I had NO idea all of this was happening and it hurts to know that Carl had to watch that all by himself. I seemed like a long time of him crying and I did not understand why they had not let Carl hold him, but everyone was very calm and successfully diverting my attention.
This is where the time line and details become a little fuzzy, as they started to dope me up on some heavy meds.
I remember being in recovery and my Mom coming in. I think Carl was with Matthew or out in the waiting room with my parents. I remember them giving me an anti nausea shot in my leg that ended up hurting for over a week. I think she must have hit a muscle.
I do not remember going back to the room at all. But we got lucky and they had not regular rooms left so we got one of the rooms that the pregnant bed-rest patients use. I think it was bigger.
6:00ish - the next thing I remember is Carl bringing John up the hospital. He was SO EXCITED! However, when he walked in and saw me in my gown with all the tubes hooked up to me, he wanted NOTHING to do with me. Come to find out, Carl may have built up "we need to be careful with Mama" a little too much. He told John that the Dr. cut a whole in my belly to get Matthew out. I think he was a little freaked out. It took almost 3 days before he would let me hug him. He brought Matthew a teddy bear and a toy frog thing, and he brought me two beads for my pandora bracelet.
7:00ish through morning - My parents took John back home for bedtime routine. Nana and Da left, and it was just Carl and I. It did not seem right to not have Matthew with us. The time line is really fuzzy here, but I know I was pumping and trying to time it to get Matthew some of the good stuff for each of his feeding times. I did this through the night and we went to see him every 3 hours and tried to nurse. It did not go so well with all the tubes hooked up to him and I both. The funniest story of the hospital trip was probably the time that my nurse said I needed to skip going to see him and get some rest...so, while on some heavy drugs I called down to the NICU and told them that my husband was coming, but he could not breastfeed! WHAT? She did not say anything, but I am sure she laughed about it after we got off the phone.
8:00am ish on the 10th - we go down to the NICU and Matthew has ripped out his feeding tube! What a little rascal! But it was probably a good thing, because it was one less thing they had to do before they gave him to us. We were there when the head NICU lady to check him out and then she released him to us. It was awesome!
The next two days - We stayed in the hospital and enjoyed pretty darn good food in a nice big room... I highly recommend Baylor of Frisco to have your baby!
John came on Thursday in the morning and met Matthew, he was so excited and cute about it. He loves his little brother. He was smiling and was not scared, but a little timid in touching him; probably because we had drilled it in his head to be easy with the baby. He held him for the first time in Daddy's lap at the hospital and it was a precious site! He would not get near me or in my bed though. :( I am pretty sure he came back that night too, but for some reason I can not remember.
I started asking to be released on Friday on Wednesday BEFORE the surgery. I knew I would be ready to be home. Sure enough, we were on our way out Friday morning! YEAH!
Friday evening we had both grandparents over for dinner and celebration. It was a perfect time for Carl and I. I had happy hormones this time (at least until this point) and was only crying because I was happy.
You hear it, but you don't believe until you have one of your own, but my heart grew at 3:23pm on March 9, 2011. I have fallen in love all over again with all three of my boys!
6:00am - Carl is up and working out
7:30 - John, Grammie and Granddaddy are all up and eating breakfast and getting ready for school.
9:00 - drop John off to school - lots of tears on the way for me.
9:15 - 12:30 - Agony! Time could not have crawled any slower! I should have left something for myself to do that day. I tried to watch day time TV (blah!) but it could not keep my attention. I was doing all that I could to keep from crying. I was trying to keep my mind off of it the best I could because I was getting so emotional. I did not really like that either though, because I felt sort of numb. But I did not want to be a ball baby.
12:30 - leave for hospital. They were so full, that they had no rooms for me, so I had to start out in recovery. Which means my parents could not go back there with us. It felt rushed and we had ALL of our bags and stuff crammed with us, but we did not have time to separate.
1:30 - Start prepping me. Then Dr. Robert came in and asked if we were ready and to start the surgery process about 2:30. Luckily Nana and Da had picked up John from school and had a successful transition to Kara and they were already on their way. So off we went.
2:45 ish - get back into the surgery room. I remember all of this this time which was SO NICE! I LOVED the anesthesiologist, she was so nice and helpful, she walked me through everything. I was numb and ready to go.
The pressure this time was so much less intense than I remembered. There was one point that a girl was sitting on my chest and pulling back the top flap of my belly and Dr. Robert pushed Matthew out, and I had no idea. I only got nausea one time for about 2 minutes when the medicine first went in.
3:23: I hear Matthew for the first time and his scream sounded like someone was gurgling mouth wash. They swept him away to do the measurements and clean up and what not. However, he could not get control of his oxygen levels due to the fluid in his lungs and he was breathing too fast. After several attempts at putting him on oxygen and then him not being able to hold the levels, the NICU nurse came in, showed him to me, let me kiss him and then rushed him away. I had NO idea all of this was happening and it hurts to know that Carl had to watch that all by himself. I seemed like a long time of him crying and I did not understand why they had not let Carl hold him, but everyone was very calm and successfully diverting my attention.
This is where the time line and details become a little fuzzy, as they started to dope me up on some heavy meds.
I remember being in recovery and my Mom coming in. I think Carl was with Matthew or out in the waiting room with my parents. I remember them giving me an anti nausea shot in my leg that ended up hurting for over a week. I think she must have hit a muscle.
I do not remember going back to the room at all. But we got lucky and they had not regular rooms left so we got one of the rooms that the pregnant bed-rest patients use. I think it was bigger.
6:00ish - the next thing I remember is Carl bringing John up the hospital. He was SO EXCITED! However, when he walked in and saw me in my gown with all the tubes hooked up to me, he wanted NOTHING to do with me. Come to find out, Carl may have built up "we need to be careful with Mama" a little too much. He told John that the Dr. cut a whole in my belly to get Matthew out. I think he was a little freaked out. It took almost 3 days before he would let me hug him. He brought Matthew a teddy bear and a toy frog thing, and he brought me two beads for my pandora bracelet.
7:00ish through morning - My parents took John back home for bedtime routine. Nana and Da left, and it was just Carl and I. It did not seem right to not have Matthew with us. The time line is really fuzzy here, but I know I was pumping and trying to time it to get Matthew some of the good stuff for each of his feeding times. I did this through the night and we went to see him every 3 hours and tried to nurse. It did not go so well with all the tubes hooked up to him and I both. The funniest story of the hospital trip was probably the time that my nurse said I needed to skip going to see him and get some rest...so, while on some heavy drugs I called down to the NICU and told them that my husband was coming, but he could not breastfeed! WHAT? She did not say anything, but I am sure she laughed about it after we got off the phone.
8:00am ish on the 10th - we go down to the NICU and Matthew has ripped out his feeding tube! What a little rascal! But it was probably a good thing, because it was one less thing they had to do before they gave him to us. We were there when the head NICU lady to check him out and then she released him to us. It was awesome!
The next two days - We stayed in the hospital and enjoyed pretty darn good food in a nice big room... I highly recommend Baylor of Frisco to have your baby!
John came on Thursday in the morning and met Matthew, he was so excited and cute about it. He loves his little brother. He was smiling and was not scared, but a little timid in touching him; probably because we had drilled it in his head to be easy with the baby. He held him for the first time in Daddy's lap at the hospital and it was a precious site! He would not get near me or in my bed though. :( I am pretty sure he came back that night too, but for some reason I can not remember.
I started asking to be released on Friday on Wednesday BEFORE the surgery. I knew I would be ready to be home. Sure enough, we were on our way out Friday morning! YEAH!
Friday evening we had both grandparents over for dinner and celebration. It was a perfect time for Carl and I. I had happy hormones this time (at least until this point) and was only crying because I was happy.
You hear it, but you don't believe until you have one of your own, but my heart grew at 3:23pm on March 9, 2011. I have fallen in love all over again with all three of my boys!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
John's 3 year appointment
Johns 3 year appointment was pretty uneventful (other than the shots! AWFUL! ABSOLUTLY AWFUL!). Everything looks good and he is right on track for development. I just wanted to post his "stats" for the record books.
Weight: 31 pounds (42%)
Height: 38 inches (56%)
And the newest stat:
Blood pressure: 121/77
PLEASE NOTE: He has not gained one pound since his 2 year appointment but has grown 3inches! NOT ONE POUND!
Weight: 31 pounds (42%)
Height: 38 inches (56%)
And the newest stat:
Blood pressure: 121/77
PLEASE NOTE: He has not gained one pound since his 2 year appointment but has grown 3inches! NOT ONE POUND!
Monday, March 7, 2011
Our last few days as a family of 3
I wish I would have had the blog when it was our last few days as a family of 2, would have been drastically different than this I bet!
Carl and I have been working hard around the house and in the back over the last couple of months to get everything up and ready for John to be a big boy and for Matthew to join our family. I think we might have underestimated the time it would take to do all of these projects, but in looking back, I am so glad that we knocked it out. We were supposed to rest this past weekend, but it did not turn out that way.
This past weekend, we ran several errands including getting a dining table for out back. Not sure what it is with Carl and buying furniture right before babies join our family! I love the table and we will get SO much use out of it. We also ran around and picked up a few last minutes things for John's playroom and overall "stocking" of the house.
While John was awake he either helped us do our projects, or one of us would play with him and spend some QT. I know how precious it is and we are going to wish for more of it soon. We took some time out to go fly a kite for the first time in the park. Pretty successful, but needed just a tad bit more wind for longer flying times. Here are some pictures.
Carl and I have been working hard around the house and in the back over the last couple of months to get everything up and ready for John to be a big boy and for Matthew to join our family. I think we might have underestimated the time it would take to do all of these projects, but in looking back, I am so glad that we knocked it out. We were supposed to rest this past weekend, but it did not turn out that way.
This past weekend, we ran several errands including getting a dining table for out back. Not sure what it is with Carl and buying furniture right before babies join our family! I love the table and we will get SO much use out of it. We also ran around and picked up a few last minutes things for John's playroom and overall "stocking" of the house.
While John was awake he either helped us do our projects, or one of us would play with him and spend some QT. I know how precious it is and we are going to wish for more of it soon. We took some time out to go fly a kite for the first time in the park. Pretty successful, but needed just a tad bit more wind for longer flying times. Here are some pictures.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Mom?
Over the last 2 days or so I have become "Mom"?!?!? What?!?!? I thought that would not happen until he was at least in school. I realize it is no big deal, but I kind of like Mama and Mommy and wanted it to last. It is just one more thing to show he is getting older. :)
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